- you know, we have to give our first dumb criminal a little credit for at least TRYING to do the right thing… The police in Gallup, New Mexico were investigating a burglary last week when a 24-year-old guy named Sage Cummins walked up to the scene and admitted HE’D stolen two TVs from the house. He said he was, quote, “very intoxicated” and he had NO MEMORY of doing it . . . but when he woke up the next morning, he, quote, “noticed” there were two TVs in his room.
- Police in Spain stopped a man yesterday for wandering out in public during a coronavirus lockdown. The man was wearing an inflatable T-rex dinosaur costume to protect himself from germs. Officers spoke with the man for several minutes before he went home… presumably in a costume that was FULL of germs that were sucked into it with that fan to keep it inflated… dumbass
- In Florida police recently arrested LeRoy Stotelmyer twice in two days for impersonating an officer. The first time, he got busted for shoplifting before saying he was an officer of the law to try to get out of it. Two days later, he was going through a toll booth when he flashed a badge at an attendant who showed LeRoy a newspaper article about his arrest for impersonating an officer. LeRoy ditched his badge and paid the toll before the attendendant called 911… They say if at first you don’t succeed… yeah, LeRoy is our DUMBASS OF THE DAY
- Youngstown, Ohio resident Elbert Shuler was recently sitting in a police car while a traffic accident was being investigated. He dropped a bag of weed in the backseat. The officer immediately wrote him a ticket. Shuler responded, “I’m getting a ticket? Can I get my weed back?” If you’re wondering… he did not get his pot back.
- In New Hampshire police recently arrested David Ladeau for telling people he has the coronavirus. He was on a public bus when he told other passengers he was infected. Passengers quickly evacuated before calling 911. Cops arrived and arrested Ladeau after he confessed to lying. He was charged with false public alarm and disorderly conduct.
- the Lakewood, New Jersey police recently crashed two weddings. The weddings were forced to end early because they were violating New Jersey’s ban on public gatherings during the coronavirus outbreak.
